I recently got onto radio - yes, as a presenter. The details of how I got in, fascinating as they may be, will have to be reserved for another day, another blogpost, some other time. Suffice it to say that I am up at 3.30am, out by 4.45am and on air between 6.00am and 10.00am every weekday morning. And I love it!!! First of all, I am the antithesis of all humans I know - I AM a morning person. I love everything about mornings. The stillness. The cool clear air. the quiet. the promise of a new day and new beginnings.... I think that the morning is the absolute sexiest time of the day. Yes, I did just go there. Sex and time.
Reason? Well, on Wednesday, we had a pastor on the show to come and talk about....sex. Now, just in case you do not know my show/station, I and my co-hosts have the morning drive show on Capital FM in Kenya [www.capitalfm.co.ke for livestream]. It's a contemporary urban show getting people up and out with some music, some banter and some interesting stuff. And yes, I do enjoy it. I have great co-hosts and it gives me a chance to talk [oh dear, I hear you say] plus I get paid for it. Not a bad deal.
Anyhoo, back to the pastor. God bless the dear man, he showed up and his first question was and I quote, "Do you think religious people make the best lovers?" My co-host and I did not even stop to think before unanimously saying, "No".
He countered back with a study from the University of Chicago that apparently stated that they ie religious people do make the best lovers. And it made me wonder. how does one come up with such a study? and who is your sample group?
I mean, think about it. for someone to know whether religious people make better lovers, one would need to have dated both religious and "irreligious" people. and further, how does one define a "religious person"? Are pagans, religious? Are animists religious? How about polytheists? well, if that is causing you brain freezes, then get this, our good pastor shared his view that all people have some form of belief including atheists. Hmm...right. So.... If all people are believers, does that make them religious? Do they religiously ascribe to their beliefs? If so, then what are we comparing? At this point I was lost and so I went out to do a little research of my own. Do religious people make the best lovers? Having sampled 14 people based solely on the criteria that I met them at some point and we were having a chat, this is what I found out.
Religious people make great lovers.
Religious people make lousy lovers.
Non-religious people [ie thos who do not ascribe to any particular organised religion] make great lovers.
Non-religious people make lousy lovers.
What binds all of these views together is a motley of argumants ranging from how the first encounter went, state of individual's mind, the subsequent unfolding/ending of the relationship, state of inebriation during said encounter[s], definition of lover, definition of good....
So I have come to a conclusion, the survey was a trick question.
Now, here's a survey which I think makes better sense. Okay, it would have, had it been carried out. See, according to a recent artlice, the Interdisciplinary Research Center on Family Violence and Violence Against Women in Montreal was trying to study "the impact of pornography on the sexuality of men, and how it shapes their perception of men and women." They ran into a problem. They could not find any man in Montreal in his 20s who has not been exposed to and consumed pornography.
Well, I reckon the men in Montreal are not alone. In fact, the non-porn-exposed adult urban male is becoming as rare as the spotted siberian snow leopard! Now, having said that, I am willing to be proven wrong. in fact, I beg to be proven wrong. Please do tell me there is but thirty men known to not have consumed porngraphy at some stage in their lives.
For everyone else, what does this mean? Well, I'm not sure but, once again, referring to my very unscientific research into the matter, the following points showed up;
1. Porn makes one believe that satisfying a woman requires great athletic prowess, a very long dick and lots of bright lights
2. Getting a woman to bed is as easy as saying, "Hey baby, take your clothes off."
3. lots of moaning = great sex; no moaning = lousy sex
4. size does appear to matter
So then I had another thought. Does all of this really matter? As long as you are getting what you want and are satisfied, does it really matter that she/he is religious/long/big/moaning/silent? Well, apparently, it does because, if we are to believe the good pastor, alot of relationships including marriages are breaking up in the green city under the sun in part due to the effects of pornography and the unrealistic expectations placed on being "a good lover."
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
― Lao Tzu
http://gawker.com/5420211/scientist-tries-to-find-man-who-has-never-watched-porn-cant
http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2009-12/uom-ate120109.php
(c) Renee Ngamau
PS. I've left the typos in for your enjoyment and delight.
All opinions are mine (surprise, surprise).
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